by David Phelps

“Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.” – Mother Teresa

September, 2026

In July of this year, my wife, Charlotte, and I took a Mediterranean cruise and toured a number of European towns and cities. One thing I noticed, as I have in the past, was that when someone bumped into me, I would say, “Excuse me,” even if the incident wasn’t my fault. I’ve normally attributed it to the fact that I’m a Midwesterer and that I sometimes think we have better manners than others. I only wished my courtesy would be reciprocated. Midwestern manners do have limits though.  If someone is in front of me and doesn’t move, I will stand there stewing. On the other hand, my wife, Charlotte, will respond with a firm “Excuse me!”

More recently, I heard a man in a busy fast food restaurant demanding, “Isn’t anyone working here?” My own response would have been more measured, in part because my job involves dealing with the public and with people who can be impatient themselves.

Paul wrote to the Galatians that “. . . the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” (Gal. 5:22-23a New Revised Standard Version). The Greek word translated “gentleness” is “prautés” (“πραΰτης”), which can mean “mildness” or “humility.” Saying “excuse me,” when you’re the offended party or allowing someone to stand in front of you might be considered “gentleness” but it might not.

How “gentle” am I being if I’m the one to apologize but resent the offense? How “humble” am I being if I think I deserve better? How loving am I if I resent being bothered? How joyful or peaceful if I’m inwardly seething? How much “patience” do I have if I inwardly resent having to wait? How kind am I if I wish someone would simply get out of the way? How faithful am I if I secretly want what’s best for me rather than seeking what God wants? It’s not just a matter of what I do but of my attitude, my motives. It starts with putting others before myself and putting God before all (Phil. 2:3-4; Matt. 6:33).

Isaiah wrote about one who “. . . was oppressed, and he was afflicted, / yet he did not open his mouth;” (Isa. 53:7a NRSV). This verse has been interpreted as referring to Christ, who didn’t resist when he was tortured and crucified (Acts 8:32-34). Christ is to be our example (1 Pet. 2:21). In every aspect of his earthly life, he showed how we are called to live.

If I’m supposed to emulate Christ, I confess I have a long way to go. Paul also knew the tension between “the Spirit” and “the flesh” very well. “For what the flesh desires is opposed to the Spirit, and what the Spirit desires is opposed to the flesh,” (Gal. 5:17a NRSV). It kept him from doing what he knew was God’s will.

He told the believers in Philippi to “Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus,” (Phil. 2:5 NRSV). Other translations render it as something like “You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.” (New Living Translation). Being Christlike begins with thinking the way Christ would think and results in doing what Christ would do. Paul went on to write that Christ “. . . emptied himself,  / taking the form of a slave, / assuming human likeness.” (vs. 7a NRSV).

We sometimes refer to an arrogant, selfish person as being “full of themselves.” Obviously, if we’re full of ourselves, there’s no room to be “filled with the Spirit,” (Eph. 5:18b). But if we empty ourselves, the Holy Spirit can come into our lives and make us new (John 14:16-17; Eph. 4:23-34). Being filled with the Spirit means being empowered for witnessing (Acts 1:8). I pray that we will be filled with the Spirit’s power always.


“For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you should follow in his steps.
“‘He committed no sin,
and no deceit was found in his mouth.’
“When he was abused, he did not return abuse; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but he entrusted himself to the one who judges justly.” (1 Pet. 2:21-23 NRSV.)
Copyright © 2026 by David Phelps